Day #4

I should be cleaning in preparation for Poker Night, but once again the computer distracted me from my to-do list.  I'm going to try to keep this short because I do have a long to-do list to complete before 6 PM this evening.

I stayed strong last night.  I did not respond to the cable guy.  I suspect that he only texted me because he DOES want to come to poker night, but that is not a good idea for many reasons.  The first and most important reason is, I don't want him to meet my friends.  I don't want him to meet my friends, because I don't want them to assume that we are a couple.  I don't want to answer the question: "So, what happened to the cable guy?"  When I uninvited him, I told him this.  It seems harsh, but it's true and I assume it's the same reason why he doesn't introduce me to his friends and family.

The cable guy and I met through Match.com a little over a year ago.  Turns out, we went to the same high school and I knew his younger brother.  Actually, I got stood up by his younger brother.  Wow, I just realized this and the irony of it all.  Anyway, we met on his lunch break at a Noodle's & Co near the campus area.  I had never been there before. 

He was exactly like his profile described.  He looked like his pictures.  I found this refreshing.  Remember, i had been out of the dating game for 2 years and the cable guy was the first guy I met after I broke up with RR.  I remember thinking the cable guy was especially sexy with his work belt and boots.  He was bald by choice and had a "soul patch," which I found sexy as well.  I remember being nervous.  I didn't remember how to date!  At the end of our lunch date, he hugged me, but gave no indication of whether or not he wanted to see me again.  While I was driving home, he sent a text, he thought I was "stunning" and couldn't wait to take me out. 

We went out.  Then, we met again for lunch on my day off.  The next weekend, we went out again.  We saw each other about twice a week for 3-4 weeks.  He surprised me on one of my days off and took the day off, too.  We had lunch that day and he brought me back to his place to meet his cat.  He showed me his guns and he was impressed that I actually knew what they were and I wasn't afraid to handle them.  Instead of going out that weekend, I invited him to my place, so he could meet my dogs.  I really like the pace of our relationship, he didn't seem to be in a rush for anything and I was comfortable with that.  If things would have kept on like this....

I thought things were going well enough, so I suggested that, maybe, he should come over and spend the night.  He agreed.  He showed up with a six-pack and an overnight bag.  I laughed at this, I laugh now as I remember it.  Only problem, he had a head ache and left after being there only an hour.  I don't know what the hell happened.  I don't know if he got scared and panicked, or maybe he really did just have a headache.  He left the six-pack, but took his overnight bag when he left. 

So, we tried again the next weekend, but this time, he called about 15 minutes before he was supposed to be there to tell me he wasn't coming.  No excuse.  He just wasn't going to be able to make it.  I can't remember if he apologized or not.  I was really disappointed.  I think he sensed this, too, but never gave any idication that he did.  Jerk.  But, it gets worse.

We tried yet again.  The next week.  Same time, my place.  This time, he is a no-call-no-show.  I panic a little.  I think something is wrong.  I try calling and texting.  No answer.  No response.  I spend most of the night worrying that something may be wrong, or worse, there could be another girl.  He texts me the next morning saying that he fell asleep and slept through the night.  He promises to make it up to me. 

Like a complete DUMB ASS, I agree, yet again, to attempt the sleep over.  Let this stupidity be a true testament to how much I really liked this moron.  Same story, he no-called-no-showed.  I assumed that he would text me in the morning and apologize and want to get together again, but I was done this time.  I deleted his sorry ass from my contacts and moved on with my life.

A couple of months later, I get a random text from an unknown number.  Yep, it was him.  He wanted to know how I had been and what I had been up to.  We text back and forth.  I am still not over being stood up at least 3 times, so I start planning my revenge.  I tell him that I am busy, I don't want to go out with him, but I need some...uh, you know...relief.  He is a guy and he is more than happy to oblige. 

We set a date and he actually showed up.  Amazing, right?  We did what we had inteded to do.  First times are always awkward, but it wasn't bad.  We ran into one problem:  an epic fail with the protection.  This may seem like too much information, but it becomes important later.  I panic for a moment and he gets dressed. 

A month goes by.  He is reluctant to come back over.  He disappears for a while and doesn't return my calls or texts.  This pisses me off.  One day out of sheer frustration, I send him a text that says:  "I'm late."  He knows immediately what I am talking about.  I lied to him.  I told him that I thought I was pregnant.

Now before you judge me too harshly for this....never mind, go ahead.  I know I was wrong.  Severly wrong.  I know I have a HUGE karmic debt to pay off for this.  I still can't help but think it's completely funny and that he totally deserves it. 

The poor, poor cable guy.  I gave him that news on a Thursday.  I let him sweat it out the WHOLE weekend.  I imagined him pacing, panicking, punching things.  This made me smile.  He sent me texts that made me feel really awful about myself, which at the time, made me glad I was torturing him the way that I was.  Monday morning I sent him a text and told him that I went to my doctor and the test was negative.  I then sent him a text telling him NEVER to contact me again because he was a complete ass.  I, instead of just deleting him from my contacts, changed his name to "DON'T ANSWER."  Just in case he did try to contact me again. 

That only lasted a few months.  He texted.  I would respond to the texts, but I never suggested meeting up or getting together.  Neither did he.  I finally confessed about the pregnancy debacle.  He was pissed and rightfully so.  I asked him to forgive me and he did.  He apologized for all the times that he stood me up.  I forgave all that, too. 

We continue to randomly appear in the other's life, I can only assume, when the we don't have anything else important going on.  The cable guy sent me texts when I was seeing Mr. Army, H, and Cesspool.  He got the same response all three times:  "I'm seeing someone and I'm not a cheater."  He understood and respected that, but it didn't hurt to try.  When I broke things off with Cesspool, he was among the first to know. 

About a month after the break-up with Cesspool, we finally managed to get together.  He invited me over to see his new place and meet his new kitten.  He had been sending me pictures of her, but he insisted that I need to see her in all her cuteness in person.  So, I did.  I made a homemade carrot cake and brought him a piece as a peace offering.  I asked him to forgive me again.  We watched Billy the Exterminator and made out. 

Being with him reminded me of all the reasons why I really liked him.  He was handsome, smelled amazing and I loved the way that he kissed me.  Against my better judgement, we ended up where we ended up.  Afterwards, we cuddle on his couch and watch more Billy.  His precious little kitten sits on the back of the couch and bats at my hair. 

He starts showing me pictures of his neice.  He tells me that he wants to settle down and have a family.  Now, if I were a normal woman, I would be thinking, "Awww, he is ready to get serious with me."  However, I am not your typical woman.  What he is saying is causing me to go into a Code-Red panic mode.  As he is saying this, I am wondering if he had poked holes in the condom.  This reminds me of all the reasons why I don't like him.  I am truly conflicted about this man. 

I honestly don't know why I do this to myself.  It is obvious to everyone that reads this that this guy is bad news.  He is BAD for me, but I can't leave him alone.  I know.  I know.  I know.  I NEED to, but I don't know if I really want to. 

I am NOT going to respond to his text.  I have the feeling that I won't go the rest of my 30 days without hearing from him again.  We just can't seem to leave each other alone. 

Wow, I just lost an hour of my life typing this stupid blog that only my two faitful followers read.  I really need to get my chores done and be productive.  I am nervous about tonight.  About, GC, and if he will show up. 

Only time will tell....